Many medieval and Renaissance Christians venerated Jesus' divinely erect penis. No, it's true. They often depicted Jesus with a massive erection, sometimes gripped by his grieving mother, Mary. The original deity of the ancient Israelites was the Bronze Age Canaanite god El, who had his penis foreskin removed in preparation for sex with two goddesses. It was his circumcision that resulted in successful procreation, leading to the long-standing tradition of venerating the potency of a deity's erect penis, even among Jews and Christians.

This reverence is one reason why the only physical description of Jesus in the Bible is the mention of his circumcised penis . . . and why his "sacred" foreskin became a prolific relic circulating the church circuit beginning around the fourth century (known as the "Holy Prepuce"). By the time of the Renaissance, Christians believed that Jesus, the perfect embodiment of manhood, must have also been the perfect image of virile masculinity.

Hence, some Christian paintings show Mary unveiling, gesturing to, or fondling Jesus' erect penis while others gaze upon his manhood with a fetish-style adoration. These portrayals are called "the pietà." Why would there be this type of incestuous erotica in Christian art? Because the Virgin Mary was not just recognized as Jesus' earthly mother.

Just like Yahweh's predecessor El and his sexual conquests, it was understood that Mary was going to be Jesus' heavenly consort, as well; and Jesus would need an engorged, circumcised penis to consummate the marriage to his beloved followers (the Bride of Christ). Depicting a fertile boner at his crucifixion meant that Jesus would be restored to life and that he would do the same for the rest of us.